Brisbane, 20th Feb 2012
Sigh. Yet another loss. I cant take this anymore!! I just cant. I mean it’s so insulting to lose 3 chess games in a row against Viru! That dim-witted ass!
In other news, we lost yet another ODI against the Aussies. Meh. This is generic and frankly it’s getting predictable and quite annoying. All these news channels criticize us cricketers so brutally man! Too much, I say! And those moronic news anchors? Diary, they shout so hysterically while “analyzing” as if a pack of rabid wolves is gnawing on their limbs.
You know, I don’t actually see the point in me being criticised. I won the T20 & ODI World Cups and this is the gratitude I receive? So what if we have lost eight tests in a row on foreign soil? It’s not like I have been caught watching porn in dressing room (BTW those Karnataka won’t-watch-porn-at-home-but-on-national-television ministers – FUCKING STUPID!).
Coming back to the losses. I fully blame that on the number 100! Saala, Paaji ki 100th century ne gaand maar rakhi hai sabki! It has put so much pressure, so much pressure. To make matters worse, Anna Hazare called Paaji yesterday and depressed him further by comparing the 100th ton to Lokpal. After the conversation, Paaji was convinced ki ab toh ho chuki century!
Sigh. The only good news is that my ad-ventures are still intact. Infact I signed a new one just yesterday… some butt lubricant something. The company representative was convinced that its the perfect product to endorse right now considering how badly opposition teams are fucking our asses!
You know diary… I feel like a lonely man nowadays. You know that famous saying na that success has many fathers but failures fucks you alone. Whatever. Point is that nothing is going right. Take yesterday night’s case. I thought I will watch some porn ..you know.. to relax. But as soon as I open the damn clip on my laptop, wifey walks in and sees me having ‘fun’! She totally freaked out and called me names which can all be summarized under one category – Super ‘beeps’. KLPD…literally! Sigh.
Khair, jo bhi hai. I have to pick myself and the team up man! Its all getting out of control. Some concrete steps are urgently required… like praying to God for Paaji’s 100th ton soon! And ofcourse, dropping Viru. Saala, his batting nowadays has gotten so bad that it makes Muttiah Muralidharan look like a master stroke-player! No wonder all those jokes about him “not being able to hold his bat longer”.. if you know what I mean.
Chalo diary, got to go. Will watch some porn for now. And this time, not to relax. Wifey is too angry for anything so watching porn is like the only fuckin option for a little fun. And after that I promise…. practice session for atleast an hour! I cant afford to lose another game…. of chess, that is, against Viru. So full on chess practice. May be some online chess against a silly computer. Cool. Done!
Chalo diary bye. The youporn clip “Big booby Sexy Mallu Aunty getting it on with hubby’s friend” has almost downloaded. Yeah baby!
